I am sitting here in the early hours worrying because our appointment for September 12th has fallen through.
Originally, BCRM had our initial consultation scheduled for the 29th August. And then that was postponed to September 7th. Which was a really difficult day for me, work-wise, so we phoned and arranged to move it to the 12th.
Evidently something went wrong: I missed a call from the consultant during the day yesterday, due to that busy work stuff (they never phoned our landline, which Jon would have answered.) I picked it up after hours and, in short, she still had an hour scheduled in for us on the 7th and has no space to see us on the 12th.
We can't speak to them now until Monday (10th).
The cumulative effect of all these cancellations and postponements is getting me down.
We try hard to keep on going with life, enjoying what it has to offer, regardless of what's happening with fertility stuff, trusting things will work out. We have put a lot of effort into letter writing, phone calls etc to ensure we've done everything possible to make this work. And every time we approach the finishing line or some positive news, the carpet gets pulled from under us.
Life has been partially in limbo for so long: it's almost 3 years since we started trying to conceive and not far off 2 since going on the waiting list for treatment. If someone said to me "Right, sorry, that's it, this isn't going to happen" I could move on and readjust. But there is no resolution like that. And there's nothing I can do to get off the treadmill.
And I'm about to be separated from Jon for possibly a year, as a result of all this stuff, and he's the main thing I depend on to stay sane. Aaaaaaargh!
